Sorry

I've been real busy coordinating a yard sale to raise funds for my DS's best friend Matt, who was badly burned on March 13. For the last 6 weeks or so I have been putting up posters, putting out donation jars, and picking up donations of items for the yard sale. We held the yard sale this weekend and instead of just 1 day, we had to run it for two days because we ended up with so much stuff! We had to use a large u-haul truck and a storage unit for the items we were given. Then on Saturday, the day of the sale, people dropped more stuff off and basically doubled what we already had. By the end of the day Saturday, we realized we did not have enough space to pack what was left back into the truck. So DH spent the night in the parking lot and we ran the sale Sunday as well. We did manage to sell quite a bit of the stuff, but the total earned wasn't as high as I was hoping for. Matt's family was very grateful though. DH, DD, DSIL, and DS were all great helps and did a wonderful job! I am so very proud of them! I just wish I could have done more than I did and taken more of the actual "doing" on my shoulders like I wanted to.

My pain has been pretty high these last few weeks. Partly due to stress (I am sure) and partly due to the fact that it has been 7 months since the first Radio Frequency procedures (lower back ones) and its starting to wear off, which means the pain in my lower back is ramping up again.

I've been feeling very down lately, specially since it has become blatantly obvious to me that I can no longer do things that need to be done and just push through the pain to do them. This has greatly saddened me. 

So basically I'm in a funk..hurting more, struggling with feeling useless, struggling with fears for my future, struggling with feeling like a failure etc. etc. So no stitching lately, hence no blogging. 

I am sorry for my lack of updates, lack of stitching and lack of motivation. 

This really sucks! I hate feeling this way but I don't know how to make it stop.